Star Trek - The Lost Years

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Star Trek: The Lost Years

By J. M. Dillard

(1989)

If you're like me, you couldn't give two shits what Captain Kirk and his cronies did between the television program and the movies, but irregardless that's what this book is about. I guess it's okay though; everyone does pretty much what you'd expect: Bones bitches a lot, Spock does a bunch of logical shit, and Captain Kirk puts the moves on his boss. At least there's no Klingons, but there are "Romulans", which are basically the same thing. Since there's about a million Star Trek TV shows, movies, novels, comic books, film strips, View-Master reels, records, and who knows what the fuck, the one thing nerds will want to know is if this story is "canon". See, if nerds don't like something (like, say, Star Trek V), they say it "isn't canon", which means it didn't actually happen. Of course Star Trek is make-believe so none of it actually happened, but what that really means is that they all agree to pretend that the thing in question doesn't exist at all, even though it obviously does and they're just being a bunch of fucking babies about it. So is this book "canon"? Let's refer to Mr. Satanism's First Rule of Star Trek™:

If Captain Kirk is in it, it's canon, no matter how ridiculous it is, even if they're fighting killer garden gnomes:

And obviously if Captain Kirk isn't in it, it isn't canon. That makes this book canon. Case closed.

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