Our tale begins with Bruce "Batman" Wayne making an astounding discovery:

Actually, that doesn't look anything like the Batman symbol:

Every time someone brings up bats it isn't necessarily about you, Bruce. Maybe you should consider reining in the ego a little bit. Irregardless, Batman decides he needs to travel back in time to check it out, but instead of going to one of his many superhero pals who could pull this off, he goes to a hypnotist:

Okay, so if it's all just an illusion what do you possibly hope to accomplish???? Seriously, could this make any less sense or be any more retarded????? Fuck off, DC Comics. Actually, who wrote this drivel? "Gerry Conway"? You can fuck off too, buddy.

So, once he's in the imaginary past Batman hooks up with an imaginary Indian named "Ke-Woh-No-Tay" and some imaginary Civil War cats, and they proceed to beat the tar out of some other imaginary Civil War cats because some imaginary medicine needs to get through the imaginary lines to some other imaginary dipshits. Seriously, this is so goddamned moronic and pointless I can't even stand it. This part is interesting though:

Even though this sucker's series was called "Scalphunter" I don't think they ever actually called him that, and I know nobody called him that in this story. So the only possible explanation is that Batman is using a racial slur. The guy's in Civil War times for one day and already he's disparaging the Indians. I give him a week before he decides he hates the nigs, too.

So anyway, Batman imaginary saves the imaginary day and comes out of his trance. Did he find what he was looking for?

What? WHAT THE HELL IS HE TALKING ABOUT??? I'll tell you one thing, I definitely found less than I was looking for, because I only expected fifty cents worth of entertainment from this rag and I didn't even get that. Incidentally, I don't know who owned this comic book before me, but they decided it was only worth twenty cents:

I'd say that's a pretty good call.