Back in the 1960s and again in the 1980s DC Comics had this series called "Dial 'H' for Hero". It was about these teenagers who had magic gizmos that turned them into superheroes, but the big gimmick was that they turned into a completely different hero every single time, and in the 1980s version every one of them was based on an idea kids who read the comic sent in. Naturally DC kept the ideas and didn't pay the kids a dime; all they got was this lousy t-shirt, literally:

Fucking crooks. Irregardless, it was probably a big thrill for kids who didn't know how hard they were being screwed to see superheroes they made up in an honest-to-god comic book. Let's see what the little rugrats came up with:

The Hummingbird, created by Stephen Moore, age... 20?

The Abyss, created by Robert A. Buethe, age... 21?

Radarman, created by Dave Elyea, age... 22??

The Familiar, created by Ben Stillwell, age... 23???

Brimstone, created by Douglas Holben, age 31????

Thirty-one? Thirty one??? Okay, that does it- what 31-year-old man sits around the house making up superheroes to submit to a contest for children? Why don't you get a job, buddy? Seriously, like half of these are from jokers old enough to be in grad school! What the hell is wrong with you people??? And what in fuck's glorious name is this:

"Furniture designed by..."??? Are you fucking kidding me? Who would do this? I mean, did the comic book actually ask people to send in decorating ideas, or did this jackass just come up with that on his own initiative? What next? "Superman's curtains created by..."? What I wouldn't give to see some joker come crawling out of the woodwork and sue DC Comics because he designed Superman's bedroom set back in Superman #234 or something. Now that would be fucking entertainment.