|
|
The World of Mr. Satanism YOU don't have to PUT UP with the HIP. |
| Home | |
|
Mr. Satanism Comic Books Mr. Satanism Online Other Online Features Off-Site Contact Us
|
Incomprehensible
Tales Presents:
The first story in this is bad and doesn't make any sense, but it's the one they're showing on the cover that really takes the fucking cake. Or doesn't take the cake, I guess. Whichever.
I'd guess you're there because you're
wearing a short plaid skirt, boots, It starts with this sad sack loser nebbish who gets canned from work for being late:
Okay, wait a minute. If he's such a loser, what the fuck is he doing engaged to a "prominent mid-town model"??? If you're sticking one of those, I'd say that makes you an automatic winner, even if you haven't had a job since the 1990s. Of course they never actually say she's one of the models, so maybe she works in the mail room or something. Irregardless, I do like the fact that somebody's giving her the thumbs up for dumping him. Also the signs outside the modeling agency are pretty hilarious, especially this one:
FUBAR is right. Anyway, the guy is pretty bummed, so he decides to fly to Greece (with his food stamps, I guess) and shack up in the ancient villa he just happens to own that's... Okay, wait, wait, STOP! He owns a villa in Greece???? I thought he couldn't even afford to keep his model girlfriend in blow? What the fuck? Then again, she has been planning a wedding, so this might be all that's left of a once vast fortune. I'll buy that. So, later he's rooting around in the library and finds out that he's like the reincarnation of this famous king from Trojan War times and has magical powers and shit. He turns back time, becomes the king again, kidnaps his ex and all the other people from the future who ever pissed him off, makes them slaves on his main ship, and then decides to use that one ship to invade the city of Troy:
Needless to say his plan doesn't go off so well:
Ha ha! You jackass! So what happens next? Nothing! That's right, this is how they wrap it up:
You mean that's it? This famous king was really some schmuck from the future trying to stick it to his landlord and that's the whole story? What the chariot-driven fuck? It doesn't make any sense; it doesn't have a point; we never find out what happens to anybody; the time-travel, revenge, and invading Troy parts don't have anything to do with each other... Seriously, who wrote this shit? Where the hell did they find this hack? Hang on, what's this ad on the back cover...?
Ah. Case closed.
Back to Seduction of the Idiot
|
| All original material on this site Copyright 1995-2008 Inept Concepts/Mr. Satanism. All rights reserved. Other materials posted for archival or referential purposes are copyrighted by their respective owners; their use here does not constitute a challenge of said copyright. By moving your lips while you read this, you waived me of all legal responsibilities into perpetuity. Please do not copy original text or images, in whole or in part, without written permission. My lawyer thinks like Darrow and dresses like McBeal, so she will win. Now buy some merchandise, you little bitch. | |
