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Aberration

(1997)

This movie fucks up right out of the gate because it's supposed to be scary, but it's about killer geckos and the only lizard name that's funnier to say than "gecko" is "blue-tongued skink". Being a bad idea never stopped anyone from making a movie out of something though, so if the guy who made Aberration is reading this, I'll go halves with you in making a blue-tongued skink movie, as long as it has lots of tits. Have your people call my people. Ha! I'm just kidding. I know you don't have any "people". Just have your wife call me and we'll set up a meeting. After nine is okay if you can't afford to waste your pre-paid minutes.

Anyway, it's a bad idea in the first place and it starts out pretty boring, but I think they knew that so they were smart and had the fuckalicious, hottie star take a bath and show off the goods early on. Then she gets dressed and it's pretty weak again until finally towards the end some gory shit starts going down, like when a gecko crawls inside her leg and this dude has get it out with a pair of scissors. In the end it's not the best killer lizard movie I ever saw, but it's worth it if you have any interest in seeing this broad naked:

Which you should. Unless you're like a eunuch or something.


 

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