Boardinghouse

(1982)

Four people die in the first few minutes of this video, so it was off to a good start. It ended up sucking balls, though. This dork with a skinny pink tie and Devo sunglasses inherits a big house and puts an ad in the paper that says he'll rent rooms to "beautiful girls, 18-25". Somehow this dumb scheme actually works, and he ends up living with all these hotties. Too bad the house is haunted or something and bad shit starts to go down. Whoever made this flick really sucks at moviemaking - people's heads are always getting cut off (by the camera I mean), and you can never tell what's going on - but at least there's lots of tits, and in one part somebody bashes a cat's head in with a hammer. Everyone likes tits, and nobody likes cats, so that's got to count for something.

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