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Casper's Haunted Christmas

(2000)

Casper has to scare somebody by Christmas or he'll end up in Hell. Don't do it, Casper! Stick to your guns and maybe we'll never have to read one of your ass-sucking comic books again! Also, until he comes through he's banished to "Kriss, Massachusetts", "the most Christmas-y town in the world". Excuse me for a moment.

ARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay. So anyway, Casper and his three ghost uncles start creeping around town getting into shenanigans, but the retarded thing is that no one notices they're ghosts! What could possibly look more like a ghost than the fucking ghosts from "Casper"??? How goddamned stupid does this movie think we are??? Seriously, when a movie has the fucking sack to come into MY living room and tell me I'm stupid that's a movie that can SUCK MY FUCKING COCK. There's also tons of piss-awful puns ("It's from the Ghost Office."), a shower scene with a guy, and a Slimer clone that does the impossible by being even more irritating than the actual Slimer. And I'm only gonna say this once, you talentless hack fuckholes: a cartoon can't have bloopers and outtakes. That was funny the first time somebody did it (well, in theory anyway) but now it's just annoying and yet another insult to my intelligence. If you worked on this miserable piece of garbage you better buy some new locks and stock up on ammo, because rest assured you're on my fucking list.

We do find out one interesting thing in this movie though: Casper was a Boy Scout before he died. I wonder if that's how he got killed? I'll bet he got lost in the woods and eaten by a bear. Or better yet, maybe he was raped and murdered by his Scout Leader, buried in the woods, then dug up and eaten by a bear. One can only hope.