Video Picks for Perverts
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(1986)
John Denver visits this podunk town to see if it would be a good place to build condos, and it turns out that everybody there - even the grownups - believes in Santa Claus. For those of you who don't remember John Denver, he was basically a combination of a country music singer and a nerd. His big shtick was guest-starring on every single TV show that came out in the 1970s, and he was actually pretty popular until he died of crashing his airplane into the ocean. And I want to take a moment here to make it absolutely clear that I was in no way, shape, or form doing bong hits with him behind the aircraft maintenance building right before it happened. I wasn't anywhere near Monterey that day- I was in Cleveland. Anyway, back to the movie. John Denver figures they're all cracked (which they are), but he falls in love with the mom from Malcolm in the Middle (wow, she was ugly back then too) so he decides to stick around, stab his boss in the back, and help them save Red Foreman's ranch. That's right, not only do they save Christmas in this movie, they save a farm too. How fucking gay. By which I mean heartwarming. By which I mean gay.
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