Home

Cinderella: Night Songs

(1987)

Cinderella was this ridiculous band that was popular for like a week or two back in the 1980s because 1) it was the 1980s and 2) they had these two hot-ass chicks in their videos who wore all these weird (but smokin') outfits. The big joke in the first video is that the band thinks the chicks are Cinderella groupies (dream on, idiots) but they're really there to see that talentless asswipe Jon Bon Jovi. Getting snubbed for Jon Bon Jovi is pretty damn insulting, so I don't blame Cinderella when they diss the hot chicks later. Fuck those bitches. When the videos are over there's some concert shit, which the back of the tape says is from their "record-smashing 1987 mega tour". I wonder what records, exactly, they're talking about? Most use of hairspray? Most times a guy swings his guitar over his shoulder & around his back during one song? And what constitutes a "mega" tour anyway? I was gonna end this review by making some joke about how all the guys from Cinderella work at the deli down the street from my house now, but I looked them up and they're actually still doing (mega) tours and shit, which is all the proof you need that this nostalgia for the 1980s has got to fucking stop.