
Video Picks for Perverts
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(1973)
This evil undead chick escapes from her tomb and goes on what passes for a rampage, but her reign of terror is so dull that even the locals don't get too riled up about it. In fact, they don't even bother driving a stake through her heart because the big stone tomb she sleeps in has a heavy lid on it and they would actually have to move it to kill her. How fucking lazy can you get? Christ, just move it a little bit, pour some gasoline in there, and light that bitch up. Not only would that solve their problem with a minimum of work, but it would also be awesome & hilarious. Instead the most anybody does is gather up some dogbane. Dogbane is poisonous to dogs, so I guess they figure it must kill vampires too. I wonder how they plan to get the vampire to eat it? Maybe they could mix it into a tasty stew. Finally this one guy decides to take care of business and he chases the dame down & sets her on fire. The very end's actually not too bad what with the screaming, burned-up vampire flipping out on everybody, but it's too little too late and the whole thing just ends up being a huge exercise in suck.
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YOU don't have to PUT UP with the HIP.