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Curse of the Fly

(1965)

I like it when a movie grabs your attention in the very first scene. For example, the very first thing that happens in this movie is that a window breaks and this insanely fuckalicious hottie in her underwear jumps out of it. Now that's good fucking filmmaking. It turns out she's trying to escape from the loony bin, and she actually pulls it off because some dude sees her running down the street half naked and like any normal guy he picks her up, steals her some clothes, gets her a hotel room, lends her some bread, and then - what the fuck, right?- marries her. Obviously something shady has to be going on here, so it turns out it's the same old story: the dude's already married but he accidentally turned his first wife into a fucked-up mutant with his dad's half-assed teleport machine. Chicks never learn.

Meanwhile, the Police Station Police are looking for the broad but when they find her they can't take her back to the crazyhouse because she's married now and I guess that makes her legally her husband's property, since this was before women's lib and all that bullshit. The chick figures she's good to go but then one night she goes downstairs, finds the mutant wife playing the piano, gets caught by her husband's weird-ass assistant bitch, and faints. Later her husband tries to tell her it was a dream or something, but she's crazy, not retarded, so she isn't buying it.* The Police Station Police don't buy it either and are on the way, so the dad decides they should teleport everyone to London, which is his fucking solution for everything. If somebody forgot to feed the dog, this clown would teleport it to London. Naturally the plan goes to shit and there's people being disintegrated and turning into mutant blobs and getting hacked up with axes and turning into skeletons and everything, so between all that and the main chick in her underwear, I'd have to say this is a pretty awesome movie.

*He should've tried to convince her that it was just the assistant playing the piano: she's not actually a mutant or anything, but she's fucking ugly enough.