Darius Goes West

(2007)

This movie's about a real-life kid who's in a wheelchair, but it's not because he's lazy like those fat fucks you see in scooters at the supermarket; he's actually got some disease called "Muscular Dystrophy Association". He decides he wants to go to L.A. to get his wheelchair pimped out on that MTV show Pimp My Ride, but because MTV has like a long-standing policy against handicapped people* they won't do it. This is one of those movies that makes you all sad and shit, and I hate that because I don't want to be sad. I want to be drunk. Also it kind of makes you feel like a loser, because along the way this kid does all sorts of cool shit that you haven't done and probably never will just because you're a goddamned slacker. That's right, you got totally punked by the wheelchair kid. It had a lot of funny parts too, though, so I'm definitely looking forward to Part 2, Darius Goes Hawaiian.

*Also Mexicans

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