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The Dukes of Hazzard: Reunion!

(1997)

The Dukes all come back to have a reunion but then they have to have a race or Uncle Jesse will lose his farm. If you ever watched the Dukes you know this is the exact same thing that happened on every single one of their shows ever, so it shouldn't be too hard for you to follow the plot. Anyway, the bad guys try to trick the Dukes by hiring a "disbarred" race car driver (I didn't even know you had to pass the bar to become a race car driver, but whatever) and by kidnapping Daisy Duke,* but of course the Duke boys win by jumping their car over stuff and by getting a karate chick and some fatass to help them kick the shit out of the kidnappers. In the end they win the race and save the day, the bad guys get busted, and Daisy Duke dicks Enos over (fucking bitch). Only two cop cars get wrecked (which is total BS in a fucking Dukes of Hazzard movie), Daisy's looking like the truck-stop waitress it was always like her destiny to become,** and Boss Hogg isn't even here because the actor who played him died from being too old and fat or something, so even though it didn't totally suck ass or anything it wasn't as good as just watching old episodes of the Dukes on CMT or whatever.

And where the fuck were Coy and Vance?

*Of course the bad guys help Daisy Duke plan for her wedding to Enos while she's kidnapped, because that's the sort of stupid shit that always happens on the Dukes.

**Daisy was never all that hot anyway, if you ask me- the blonde Daisy in the new version is a lot better, 'cause she's played by that one slut.