Video Picks for Perverts
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(2003)
This insanely hot Egyptian piece kills herself so she'll live forever, which seems counterintuitive, but whatever. They make her into a mummy, and thousands of years later these cats dig her up and then get killed by a bunch of flying plastic scorpions (this part's fucking hysterical). Later somebody moves the mummy to the worst community college ever (they have finals on the weekend), where this professor brings her back to life so she can go on a rampage. A big part of her rampage is dancing around and showing off her amazing rack though, so screw all these drive-thru college fucks, I'm rooting for the mummy. After she rips a few hearts out (she already stole mine the first time she took off her top), an ugly blonde and a sub-mediocre redhead try to destroy her, but seriously, look at this chick:
Do you really think something of that caliber deserves to get wasted by a couple of also-ran bitches who couldn't even screw their way into a real college? I say no way, and I'm happy to report that this movie obviously agrees with me because in the end the mummy wins.
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YOU don't have to PUT UP with the HIP.
