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Hallows Point

(2007)

Here's some shit that was going through my head while I was watching this movie:

Nice hat. The Adicts concert is next week though.

You can't spell "shower" without "show 'er", so what's with the TSS (Titless Shower Scene™)?

A serial killer who looks like a 50-year-old version of Garth from Wayne's World isn't scary.

Wow, you'd think at that range those bullets would've gone right through Garth and killed that chick too. Lucky break for her, I guess.

I wonder what's in that container? Oh, "Flammable Liquid".

A ghost that looks like Garth from Wayne's World after being set on fire still isn't scary.

Unless you're this guy, apparently. "I'm coming home, Elizabeth!"

Can you really write an entire book about running down one flight of stairs and out the front door?

I don't think that little girl needs any more candy.

Man, these are some homely cheerleaders.

What happened to the one kid's droog hat? I was digging the hat.

"Séances are gay!" Yeah, dude, they are gay. Fuck those faggot séances!

The goth chick's a virgin? Bullshit.

Why is the guy with the glasses making out with someone's mom? Who is she anyway, the chaperone or something?

Aw, you have to burn the letter the main chick's dead mother gave her. Too bad there isn't any other paper around, like that huge map hanging on the wall behind you.

"They probably dared each other." Good guess, detective.

That reporter's pretty fucking hot. Take it all off, baby!

Did the cops actually set up a bunch of porta-johns for this media circus, or did the people who made this movie maybe just film all the crowd parts outside an Aerosmith concert or something?

Why isn't this gorier? Where the hell are the tits?

Fucking weak.