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Highlander: The Source

(2007)

For God's sake, how many of these are they gonna make??? It's like having chronic diarrhea- no matter what you do more and more shit just keeps coming out. This one's pretty hell-bent on not making any sense or telling you what's going on (and if you don't like it, you can go fuck yourself), but I think it's about some Highlanders who want to find like the source of their powers. I thought they already explained this: the Highlanders have powers because they come from outer space, until they changed it and decided they were actually time travelers. So now they're changing it again? Dammit, all these explanations are stupid as hell anyway so pick one and stick with it, you addlebrained fucks. Pretty much everything about this blows, but the absolute worst has to be the bad guy: he looks like a gay albino biker, acts like a pro wrestler (except without all the subtlety and nuances), runs around all sped up like he's chasing Benny Hill, and of course when he first shows up he's dressed like a rooster. What is it with these movies and bad guys who look like chickens? And why does the big climax happen at Burning Man? This actually came out on the Sci-Fi Channel, and that's generally where shitty ideas go to die, so hopefully this'll be the last we hear of these alien time-traveling rooster pricks. Suck my balls, Highlanders. Suck. My. Fucking. Balls.