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It's Alive III: Island of the Alive

(1986)

There's killer babies turning up all over the place, so everybody decides to round them up and dump them all on a deserted island. As ideas in horror movies go that's actually not too bad, but then some dipshits decide to visit the island to see how the babies are doing. I don't know what they expect to find- do they think the little rugrats are gonna cure cancer or invent a new form of government out there? They're killer babies- they all probably ate each other, which means the toughest one is the only one left and he'll probably eat you. Idiots. Sure enough, the monsters kill most of them (too bad about the chick, too- she had a great ass), steal their boat, and sail to Florida. When they get there they happen to land on this boardwalk where a bunch of punk rockers are having a brawl and randomly raping chicks (for those of you too young to remember, that kind of thing went on all the time in the 1980s), and I guess the monsters get caught up in the excitement or something because they kill a few more people and one of them throws a bunch of cops off a roof. Then most of the monsters die of the measles, which is always an exciting way to end a movie about monsters. The gore is okay, but the only tit we see is a monster tit and while I won't pretend I haven't done worse frankly it's not something I like to be reminded of. They should've at least shown that chick who bought it on the island naked. She was fine.


 

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