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Kids in America

(2005)

Alright, if you're going to make a flick about high school that happens in 2005 you should probably do like a little research because last time I checked people under the age of "old" weren't exactly into Wham, Elton John, Sixteen Candles, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, or any of the other fucking 1980s crap that's in this movie. Fuck, it's even named after a 1980s song. You people making movies and stuff nowadays really need to wake up and figure out that the world didn't end when you graduated college, before you end up like the goddamn Baby Boomers. Anyway, this flick is basically about these kids who have this incredibly bitchy principal and decide to protest and shit. Normally I like it when high school kids raise hell and piss everybody off, but too many things in this movie just plain suck: the protests are all super lame (two words, you misguided delinquents: "pipe bombs"); the main chick, who's a hot redhead, never shows us the goods; and Nicole Richie is in it, which means of course you can't eat anything while you're watching it or you'll end up puking when you see her ugly face. Worst of all, the movie thinks it's all important and shit and you can almost hear the people who made it breaking their arms patting themselves on the back. Well try not to choke on your own cocks, idiots, because your movie is a trite piece of shit. Kiss my ass, Kids in America.