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Megalodon

(2004)

This reporter chick goes to this giant oil rig to get the story or whatever, and of course right away one of the guys who works there complains about how they're destroying the environment and shit.* Here's a news flash, hippies: You can't destroy the environment. Go ahead and try it right now- go outside and throw beer cans in the river and stomp on all the flowers and shoot some birds with a pellet gun. Now look around- there's still an environment, isn't there? Morons. If you really hate oil and technology that much, go live in Canada.

Anyway, they end up drilling into this underground ocean or something and all these prehistoric fish come out and one of them bites this dude's arm. That's bad enough, but then a giant shark shows up too and starts attacking everyone and fucking everything up. Most of the people escape, but the shark eats this one cute brunette and since her geezer boyfriend knows that she's the best piece he's ever gonna get again he flips out and goes down with a sub and blows the shark up, plus himself. This movie started off pretty cool with the crazy fish biting that guy and shit, but the shark attacks weren't gory at all and when the one dude decides to blow up the shark it's over in like two seconds and it's totally weak. If they actually made the end good and had some more blood and maybe showed the brunette's tits it might have been a great movie, but instead it's close but no cigar.

*You wouldn't think a hippie would even put in an application at a place like that. Come to think of it, a hippie wouldn't put in an application anywhere.