Presumed Dead

(2006)

Audrey from Twin Peaks as a renegade cop who plays by her own rules? Are you fucking kidding me? Here's a complete list of everything I would buy Audrey from Twin Peaks as:

-Housewife
-Teacher
-Housewife with a part-time job as a teacher
-Housewife's best friend, who dies first

As you can see, "renegade cop" isn't anywhere on that list, probably because Audrey playing a badass is completely ridiculous. The tougher she acts, the more she sounds like a dumb, kinda bitchy chick who's trying to be sarcastic. It's fucking embarrassing. Plus she looks like she's fresh off the redeye from Hagville, so you can't even ignore what's coming out of her mouth and stare at her tits or something. Remember back when Twin Peaks first came out and she was like the hottest piece of ass on wheels? I guess 1990 was longer ago than I thought.

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