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Pulse

(1988)

This little kid goes to visit his dad, and just in time too since it looks like not having a strong male role model is taking its toll: he's carrying around "Dallas" for fuck's sake.* Being queer is the least of his problems though, because all the electricity in dad's suburb is actually alive and it decides to start killing people. First it takes over every appliance in the house, then it starts doing shit like closing doors and keeping faucets from turning off, even though doorknobs and faucets generally don't run on electricity. They didn't even bother to invent some idiot reason why that would actually work, like making it a "house of the future" where everything is automatic or some ridiculous shit like that. How lazy can you fucking get? After the electricity scalds the piss out of the kid's SMILF in the shower the dad gets fed up and starts trashing the place with an axe. It's one thing to try to kill a little homo disappointment of a son who probably asks for "Bratz" on his Christmas list every year, but don't mess with a man's pussy. The electricity fights back by starting fires, flooding the place, locking more doors, and doing pretty much everything else you can think of since whoever came up with this movie doesn't seem to know the difference between "electricity" and "magic". The dad finally chops down the big utility pole in front of his place and it crashes and destroys half the fucking house, which was the only really cool part of this movie. Then at the very end it goes all Koyaanisqatsi on us, as if making a movie full of special effects about how bad technology & electricity are somehow makes sense on any fucking level. What a bunch of oxymorons.

*That's Barbie's horse, for those of you who never dated outside your age bracket.