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Santa and the Three Bears

(1970)

I guess the forest ranger in this Christmas special doesn't have any family or friends, because he spends all his time wandering around talking to himself or occasionally to the local bears. He's not a very good park ranger, either, since he goes out and illegally cuts down a Christmas tree for his own use. What, you think the law doesn't apply to you because you wear a uniform? Typical. Anyway, when the ranger tells these bear cubs about Christmas they start spazzing out and their mom can't hibernate, so finally she goes to "have a talk with that Mr. Ranger". I figured she was gonna maul the shit out of him, which would've been awesome (and frankly she'd probably be doing the poor, lonely bastard a favor- he actually wrapped Christmas gifts for himself and put them under the tree). That's not what happens though. Instead, the ranger agrees to dress as Santa and visit the bears so they can have Christmas too. He takes a nap first, though, and when he wakes up these faces in the fire are singing to him. What the fuck??? You know what? I don't think those bears can talk at all- I think this guy has just completely flipped his lid. Irregardless, he's like a man of his word and he tries to take the bears some Christmas gifts even though there's a fucking blizzard going on. I'm sure in his deranged mind he's doing something nice, so it's too bad he'll probably end up dying alone and no one will find the body until long after his bear "friends" eat most of it and he can't be identified. Jesus Christ, what a depressing cartoon.


 

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