Home

The Skull

(1965)

Here's a goddamn news flash for you: No one's afraid of skulls. If you're making a movie called "The Skull" you might as well call it "The Candy Bar" or "The Table" because just as many people will come to see it, by which I mean none. What the fuck is a skull going to do to you? I guess it could roll after you if it got really motivated, but even if it caught you and bit you on the foot or something it doesn't seem like it would be that big a deal. In this movie the skull possesses people, but I say you've got to be pretty weak-willed to get pushed around by a skull, so if it's you against the skull and that's how the hand plays out, I'm sorry but I've got no pity for your pathetic ass. Hell, this skull tries to possess Grand Moff Tarkin and he's able to resist, and this is the guy who let that whiny pussy Luke Skywalker blow up his kick-ass space station. Of course, the skull gets so pissed off about it that it flies through the air and bites Grand Moff Tarkin on the neck, but I think a baseball bat would have solved even that problem. So if you own a baseball bat, there's no fucking reason to watch The Skull.