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Weekend Pass

(1984)

These sailor cats hit the town to score some ass, but I guess they're a little confused because they waste most of their time doing stupid crap that has nothing to do with pussy: the black guy goes back to his old hood and fistfights the leader of a gang that dresses like a cross between Bloods, Michael Jackson from "Thriller", and fags; another dude wants to be a stand-up comic so he does like an amateur night, which really fucking blows because they show a bunch of the other stand-up comics and every one of them completely sucks ass; and, worst of all, one of them does go on a date with an actual chick who's willing to throw it out, but decides not to nail her because he thinks she's too wild. I guess Navy guys are all queers. In the end they all go to a disco party at a gym where everybody is dressed like an Olivia Newton-John Video (duh), hook up with nice girls (lame), and learn a valuable lesson (gay). There are tits in this movie, but am I wrong to expect a comedy from the 1980s about Navy guys on leave to be more like Porky's and less like The Facts of Life Go to Paris? What the fuck? They should've called it "WEAKend Pass".