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Yeti

(2008)

A plane full of football players crashes in the mountains and a yeti starts eating all of them. Football players, huh? Alright, you've got five minutes to give me one good reason why we shouldn't root for the yeti.

Time. Okay, that said this isn't too bad. Basically all they did was take that old cannibal soccer team flick Survive! and throw in a yeti, but there are worse ideas for a movie and this does have some cool shit in it, like a guy using his dead buddy's arm for a splint, dumb jocks finally serving a purpose (lunch), and some hilarious yeti-on-idiots violence. Another good thing about this is the actual yeti: it's a little goofy, but at least it's not a goddamned cartoon the whole time (it is sometimes though, and of course those parts look utterly retarded, especially when it's jumping around like the Incredible Hulk). On the minus side, I was super pissed that the chink bitch survived, because she was a major cunt. The yeti was leaving all the living people alone because there were plenty of dead bodies to chow on, so what does this twat do? She burns them! And as if that isn't bad enough, those bodies were all the people had for food too! If I had been there I would've caved her worthless skull in on the spot. We could've eaten Chinese for a week. Also I could have done without the ridiculous Sylvester Stallone in Cliffhanger ending with the yeti hanging from a guy who's hanging from a branch that's hanging over a cliff. So this movie isn't perfect, but the lame parts are a small price to pay to see a yeti give a guy a rib shot with his own severed leg.