Home

Zardoz

(1974)

It's the future, and, just like scientists predicted, a giant, goony-looking stone head flies around spitting rifles and shotgun shells out of its mouth. All these people think the head is God, but this one dude finds out the head's name is a joke based on the Wizard of Oz so he sneaks inside it and caps the wise-ass running the thing. When the head lands, the dude gets trapped in this town where the people live forever and there's hot, half-naked chicks wandering around all over the place. Of course, then they expect us to believe that it's a really crappy place to live and the dude has to destroy it. They're always making sci-fi stories where people live in like this perfect world where they never die and there's free stuff and top-notch snatch everywhere, then telling us that it sucks to be them and they'd be better off dead or whatever. You know what? I call bullshit. I think movies like this are just a big scam by the Man to keep everyone else down so they can keep all the money and pussy for themselves. If I lived in some future place where I didn't have to work and just partied all the time and then this clown showed up saying it was evil or whatever, I'd cap that fucker in the head ASAP and go right back to having eternal youth and fucking tons of hot futuristic pussy. I'm pretty sure I could live with myself.