Colombo and his beatnik posse are on a rampage, running up their buddy's phone bill, playing the bongos without actually touching them, and, naturally, peddling a bunch of incoherent gibberish:

Dave the Beatnik: "You know what I always say? Who needs a mother? I've been born!"
Colombo: "He's tuned in. You can learn from Dave."

Dig it, shit-for-brains. The best quote comes later though, when we find out that Colombo is involved in some mob-related shenanigans but can't keep his people in line:

Colombo: "I've been having difficulty with two of my men- Studs and the Weasel."

Okay, really, how could he not know that, someday, he was going to have to say that? That's neither here nor there though- the real story begins when Colombo decides to commit a murder solely because kicks just keep getting harder to find. Of course this sort of thing never pans out (cf. Rope, the Foxy Knoxy trial, et al.), and eventually his victim's brother busts the case wide open through the clever technique of just hanging around. It's all completely retarded, except of course when it's annoying, although I suppose there is some novelty value in seeing Colombo commit the crime instead of solve it. Come to think of it, he solved the vast majority of the crimes on his own show by just hanging around too, didn't he? Maybe this is where they got the idea.

Bonus: Learn Beatnik, the Bloody Brood Way!