Captain Nemo rescues the Rifleman and some other assorted clowns when their boat sinks, but they're a little perturbed when they find out that he expects them to live in his underwater city for the rest of their lives. Frankly the place doesn't seem that bad - they have booze, there's no shortage of hot ass, and I don't recall seeing a single black person - but people hate being told what to do so naturally they all want to escape. The first guy who tries drowns (while everyone else just watches through a window- it's pretty ruthless), but eventually the Rifleman and a couple others swipe one of Nemo's submarines and they do manage to get away, except of course for the cat who tries to take a bunch of gold with him, who dies. (Oh, he didn't steal the gold or anything, it was given to him, but the movies always punish people who try to escape from someplace with a bunch of found gold. The message, apparently, being that falling ass-backwards into obscene amounts of money is morally wrong, and you should avoid it. Unless you happen to run a movie studio of course.) In between the rescue and the escape, this flick is a weird mix of shit that kinda rocks (a giant manta ray attack) and annoying, corny crap ("cute" animals doing goofy shit). It's one of those movies that tries to please everybody and ends up pissing off me, but I'll cut it some slack since the toy submarines do look pretty cool. When they finally get around to remaking this though we better see more of the giant manta and less of the dancing bird. Oh, and throw in some goddamned tits while you're at it, Hollywood. Seriously, we're all adults here.