I'm so tired of people talking about David Bowie like he was some big innovator or something. From his stupid Chipmunks lift ("The Laughing Gnome") on all he ever really did was stay just plugged-in enough to know who to rip off. Frankly I respected him a lot more after he finally said "Fuck this jazz, I wanna be rich," and released Let's Dance. That doesn't excuse some of the puke he's put out since then though. For example this tape, containing three shitty videos:

1. "Day-In Day-Out" This isn't the worst Bowie song (that would be his cover of "Love Missile F1-11"), but the video's pretty lame: it's just Dave tooling around on a pair of roller skates while a couple of angels videotape this family of losers and their hilariously tragic circumstances. The most hysterical part is when the LAPD smashes into the family's house with a goddamned tank over some misdemeanor shoplifting and prostitution charges. And, seriously, roller skates? I know you're the last person in the world who wants to hear this, Ziggy, but it's not the 1970s anymore.

2. "Loving the Alien" This is the kind of music video they always make when no one can come up with a good story or enough bikini babes. In other words, it's just a bunch of random crap. There is a part that looks just like the cover of the album Tonight though. I assume this means that "Loving the Alien" was supposed to be the big song from that record. Ha! Talk about having low standards.

3. "Day-In Day-Out" What? Again? Oh, excuuuuse me, it's the "extended director's remix cut". I'm so glad I get to sit through it one more time. Fuck you, Bowie.

Seriously, what's the point of this tape? "Presenting: Bowie, when he sucks!" Why not release a video of him falling down the stairs too? I suppose it would be dishonest of David Bowie to pretend that these songs don't exist, but Christ, he doesn't have to act like he's proud of it.