Everybody watched The Dukes of Hazzard back in the day, but even little kids kind of understood that it was a moronic piece of crap. I mean, they used the EXACT SAME PLOT EVERY SINGLE WEEK. People constantly make fun of the other redneck shows that were popular at the time (like Sheriff Lobo) but for some reason nobody ever calls out the Dukes, even though it was the shittiest, laziest one of them all. That's why it was so surprising that the Dukes of Hazzard movie starring the guy from Jackass was actually okay. I'm not saying it was fucking rocket science or anything, but it was definitely better than any episode of the idiot series. (Except for the one where everybody thinks the Duke boys are dead and Cooter soup ups the General Lee so that it looks like a ghost car. That one rocks.) Most of the actors from the first Dukes movie managed to avoid signing anything forcing them to be in Part 2 though (See? Jessica Simpson's not so dumb.), so they had to go the "Teen Dukes" route this time around which left them with two options:

1. The Duke Teens drive around the world with a talking mule, solving mysteries

2. The Duke Teens act like the teens in any other movie, and we get to see some fucking tits

Fortunately they went with option #2, so even though it's all pretty stupid (Why the hell do they ask a bunch of little girls where to find a V-8 engine?) and the jokes are mostly lowest-common-denominator garbage for retard pinheads (farting, cross-dressing, a pig falling off a roof... okay, fine, I liked the part where the pig fell off the roof), at least there's plenty of nudity to take our minds off how much everything else sucks. And this flick does feature the hottest Daisy Duke yet, so that's something. I hope they give it a fucking rest after this though, because I shudder to think what they'd do for Part 3. "Dukes of Hazzard Babies"? "Coy and Vance: The Early Years"? "Enos Goes Nutzoid"? Unless it's called "Daisy Does Hazzard" and stars Ellie Kemper as Daisy and my penis playing multiple roles, you can count me out.

Random Hottie Shout-Out: Blonde in the audience at Boss Hogg's speech, blue necklace, waving a little American flag around. She's aces. (I know he gives two speeches, but she's there both times because they just used the same crowd scene twice. Lazy bastards.)

Random Willie Nelson Shout-Out: His ad-lib during the credits ("And you call yourself a Mason.") is funnier than anything else in this movie.