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Girls on Probation

(1938)

Now we're talkin'. There's two main girls in this movie- a brunette, who always does what she's told, and a blonde, who doesn't ("that wench", the brunette's father calls her). One night there's a big party, so the blonde borrows a dress from the dry cleaners they work at and "loans" it to the brunette. Wouldn't you know it though, the owner of the dress shows up at the party and sees the brunette wearing it! It's a real Lizzie McGuire development, but they played hardball in the 1930s so instead of a few zany antics and learning a valuable lesson, the brunette gets arrested! The blonde skips town, but there's a nationwide manhunt going on for her, so she has no choice but to become a bank robber. Later the girls bump into each other again, and through laughably convoluted circumstances the brunette ends up sharing the blame for one of the bank jobs and for taking a few potshots at the pigs. A year later they're both out on probation, but the blonde needs some bread so she kidnaps the brunette and forces her to pawn her engagement ring and turn over the money. The brunette tips off the cops though, and when they show up a gunfight ensues and the blonde takes a few in the belly and dies a horrible, agonizing death. That's what you get for borrowing someone's dress without permission, you delinquent bitch. Justice is served.

Meanwhile, in Europe, Hitler was invading Austria and killing every Jew he could get his hands on. Nice priorities, 1938.

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