So how do you turn a white Christmas into a golden Christmas? Have you ever pissed in the snow? Well there you go. This movie is about a chick and a guy who loved each other as kids but don't recognize each other as adults. Can a Golden Retriever dressed as Santa Claus bring them back together? Is the Pope Catholic? Does a bear shit in the woods? Did I just puke everywhere? Seriously, it's like someone found the worst romantic comedy of all time and tried to salvage it by crossing it with the latest Air Bud sequel. (I know that's like multiplying something by a negative, but trust me, this is how Hollywood thinks.) The truly sad part though is that even if you spend all your spare time reading Sleepless in Seattle fan fiction to your Air Buddies figurines you will still hate this awful fucking movie. The only part that didn't totally bore the shit out of me was towards the end, where it seemed like the two main idiots' inability to hook up was literally killing the magic dog. As it turns out though the damn mutt was just having puppies, which is too bad because that would've been an interesting angle. At least then there'd be something to root for.