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The Legend of Bigfoot

(1976)

Again with fucking Bigfoot. Or, as my people call him, maize. Honestly, if you really believe that there's a huge ape-like monkey living in the woods of America despite the fact that no one's ever taken a picture of one, found a dead one, found any bones of one, been friended on Facebook by one, or even turned up the inevitable sick fuck who claims to have had sex with one, you truly are a grade-A moron. The dude behind this flick wouldn't take moron for an answer though, so he bought a movie camera and went looking for Bigfoot himself. Now, Bigfoot is notoriously difficult to capture on film because he doesn't exist, but over the years this guy managed to do it like fifty times. I wouldn't be surprised if he had footage of Bigfoot's last family reunion, or pictures of him at the senior prom. The fact that it all looks totally fake? Well, the guy who made this movie is no longer with us, but if he was I'm sure he'd explain that by telling you to go fuck yourself. There is some good Animal Planet type stuff here though, the best being this bit where a little squirrel keeps trying to wake up his squirrel friend after it gets run over by a car. If you want to make a girl cry and don't feel like hitting her, I guarantee this scene will do the trick. I doubt it'll make her believe in Bigfoot though.

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