For those of you who never got a classical education or played Dungeons & Dragons, Medusa was a chick with snake hair who was so fucking hideous that anyone who looked at her turned to stone. Frankly I've done worse (Donna), but she was definitely bad news. So is this movie about Medusa? No. In fact, for the first 20 minutes it isn't about anything. Somebody does push a taxicab over a cliff with a bulldozer though. That was kind of entertaining. Eventually we do find out that everyone's looking for a copy of some cat's will because they want it changed, or don't want it changed, or something. Anyway, they're whacking people over it. Despite all the murders though this is boring beyond belief. It just goes on and on and on until you start to think that time has stopped and you're going to have to spend eternity watching this horrible fuck-basket of a movie. And, to further piss us off, the closest we get to seeing any skin is a TSS! I can't believe these ass-sucking cockholes. This movie eats it.

"All I want to do now is get drunk," says the main cat's brother-in-law when it's finally all over. Amen, brother, amen.