
Video Picks for Perverts
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(2002)
When you find out a movie like this exists you have to look deep down inside yourself and honestly answer one very important question: Do I really want to see girl-on-monkey action? Of course the answer is yes, but unfortunately this flick doesn't deliver. In fact, it's just a bunch of dyking out, not that that's a bad thing since the main chick is Misty Mundae (so choice). Frankly though I was hoping for something a little more far more disturbing. None of the other dames in this flick even comes close to Misty's hotness level (way too many of them have huge, deformed tits) but they're all doable, with the sole exception of the blonde who ends up getting lobotomized. (What do you do after you lobotomize a blonde? Patent your free energy machine! Ha ha! Yeah, I don't get it either.) There's actually a few funny jokes too ("And I'm gonna miss you most of all, Scarecrow."), which is pretty amazing for a script that was probably typed with one hand. What the fuck is up with the last half hour though? There's a rap and everybody dances, then later there's another song and everyone dances again... They're not even naked! That's valuable time we could have spent looking at Misty's tits. Let me give you Kansas City faggots some advice: any time you're making a movie and you think "We could use some people dancing here," you are WRONG. Unless you're in Bollywood, in which case you're still wrong, but it's politically incorrect to point it out. |
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YOU don't have to PUT UP with the HIP.