What the fuck is the deal with these The Santa Clause sequels? Each one has enough plot for six movies, enough story for none, sucks and is totally annoying, and yet somehow they're popular enough that the guy from Home Improvement has managed to coast on them for like a decade. Between the main plot, the subplot, and the mini-sub plot, there's so much pointless shit going on that you barely notice the one or two things that are almost clever (Santa's ringtone, Jack Frost's icicle tie). It still finds a way to be boring as hell though, and way too much of it is just an excuse to show off Santa's pad MTV Cribs style. Sorry, but I don't give a damn how many vending machines are in the elf break room, and frankly his fireplace is creepy as fuck:

And does this movie really need three climaxes? That's two less than you'd get if you spent the night with me, baby, but it's at least one too many for this movie. I especially hated the one where the little girl saves her parents by melting Jack Frost's heart with love; our flood insurance isn't even gonna begin to cover all the damage caused by the puke that was responsible for.

I totally sympathize with the title though. If I was one of the actors contractually obligated to be in the next 15 of these shitfests, I'd sure be looking for an escape clause.